Operation Badger Hound>Polizeioffizier Beethoven
This past weekend I went to Berlin to hang out with some friends at an indoor Super Frisbar Tournament. That was a lot of fun, but while in town I was able to volunteer some of my time to Berlin's police force. Yeah, they have an exchange program! Through the interweb I was able to swap my shift with a guy named Reiner who was coming to Prague for research on his book about microwave ovens. Luckily he was posted to an undercover sting operation in front of the Brandenburg Gate. Tourism and a hard hours work! Efficient times!
I was told to show up in lederhosen, (casual, not dress or S&M) and look for a man dressed as a badger. Sure enough there was a man in a badger suit. I walked up to him and said the code word, "Gesundheit." He said, "Danke", like Reiner told me he would and I responded with, "you are welcome." This startled him, because I was actually supposed to say, "dachshund." He looked me over once again and said, "So you are filling in for Reiner today? Here in Germany we don't take our code words lightly. Now go stand at the other end of the gate. Whenever you see a man with an ugly mustache you will need to do the Schulplattler dance." I said "Schulplattler?" The manbadger responded angrily, "Damnit, didn't Reiner tell you to learn the schulplattler? Ok, basically you will need to jump around and slap your shoes. The dance is usually done in 4/4 times so try to keep the beat by humming to yourself."
Well there are a lot of men with ugly mustaches in Berlin because after an hour all of that dancing was making me tired. I returned to my partner and asked him whether he could write me a note so I could score some free tickets to see Die Walküre. He told me they didn't have any left, but he recommended I see another Wagner opera instead, Tannhäuser, but I kind of had my heart set Die Walküre.
1 Comments:
It must be tough going on these missions. Plus, the Brandenburg gate is big. Just the two of you keeping guard on that huge entrance. I bet there were mustach men crossing those gates while you were dancing.
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